Students Use Silence to Give Voice to LGBTQ+ Community

For anyone who’s ever eaten lunch in Kraft Dining Hall or walked through the Campus Center between academic periods, a day of silence at Rivers seems nearly inconceivable. But the national student-led Day of Silence, observed on a recent Friday, is an annual occurrence with a serious purpose: To draw attention to the silencing—actual and metaphorical—of members of the LGBTQ+ community.
Students across the country take a one-day vow of silence in support of those who’ve experienced bullying, name-calling, and harassment because of their gender expression, gender identity, or sexual orientation.

The day has been observed at Rivers for several years, with students wearing black to denote their participation. Over the winter, a survey was conducted, asking students what the Day of Silence means to them. At an all-school assembly on the morning of the designated day, some survey responses were shared. The Day of Silence is “a peaceful protest,” wrote one student. “A chance to show pride,” said another. “Respectfully supporting the LGBTQ+ community,” yet another chimed in. But “Nothing much” and “I don’t know” were also among the answers submitted.

Students and faculty members then shared stories of silencing—their own or that of friends or family members. Mary Mertsch, faculty advisor to the Gender Sexuality Alliance, read a story submitted by a fellow faculty member, who borrowed a car with a rainbow bumper sticker when she arrived at Rivers for her first job interview—and who worried about what the sticker might say or reflect about her. Tayja Sallie ’21 spoke of a transgender friend whose family cannot accept him. “He is silenced within his own home. Figuratively, he is homeless, granted none of the kindness of a home.”

Hunter Taylor-Black ’19 talked about her journey from being a non-participant in the Day of Silence to eventually coming out as gay. “I never wore black. I never chose silence. But I did,” she said, acknowledging her own self-silencing. Coming out at school, she says, wasn’t easy. “And why come out?” she asked rhetorically. “Why make things difficult? Why make life harder for yourself?” She answered her own question, to a standing ovation from many in the audience: “I got tired of being silent.”

Mertsch noted that this year’s Day of Silence coincided with the instatement of a new policy barring transgender people from the military. “Some will feel that my talking about this is political,” she said. “And I can understand why others might feel that way. But to me, these aren’t political issues. They are human rights issues.”

Alexa Francesconi ’19 , of the GSA, announced a fundraiser for the Rainbow Railroad, a nonprofit organization that helps LGBTQ+ people facing state-sponsored violence to escape to safety. Students had the opportunity to buy white T-shirts that will be tie-dyed outside on the turf during lunch on May 3, with proceeds from the T-shirt sales going to Rainbow Railroad. To date, the GSA has received orders for 187 T-shirts and anticipates raising more than $1,800 for the organization.

“This year when we were planning, I knew I wanted to do a charity initiative,” says Francesconi. “The whole club realized the importance of reaching beyond the Rivers community and were invested in the idea as well. It also helps people at Rivers feel like there’s a legitimate way they can take action after they hear personal stories and see kids participating in the vow of silence.”

Mertsch says that a “huge” number of students took up a place on the stage. “I’d say we had more students participate in the assembly this year than in the 11 years I’ve been here.” She said that members of the club are “always thinking of ways to effect change on campus,” with a lot of the conversation this year focusing on using more inclusive language in school communications and formulating more inclusive policies.

At the end of the day, students and faculty members gathered on the quad for a collective scream to “break the silence.” It was a cathartic moment that gave vent to the frustration of silence—and expressed the joy of lifting voices together to oppose oppression.

Says Mertsch, “For me, even though I don’t stay in silence, that moment feels celebratory—like we are celebrating the awareness that we’ve raised over the course of the day.”

“I’m incredibly excited that this year’s Day of Silence has had such an impact,” says Francesconi. “It’s an important tradition, and one I hope continues for as long as there are kids in this school who need it.”
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